May 12 12:10pm
"Ok, Mr. Busy Pants..."
I'm thinking my roommate has bigger issues than I'll ever know. For example: We seem to have this reoccurring "war of the coffee mugs." You see I'm a bit of a collector of kitsch junk and other paraphernalia. I have tons of really cheezy ashtrays, coasters, etc from the forties right through till modern day. Every few years I get rid of some of it and keep other stuff depending. But one thing I never get rid of is coffee mugs, as I have ones that I really enjoy and I will pick different mugs based on how I feel. Probably sounds dumb... ok, so I know it sounds dumb. But every few days I come home and find out that my roommate has taken all except maybe 4 mugs and hidden them. So I in turn hunt around and then return all the mugs to their rightful home... the upper cupboard. We play this game about twice a week in silence. Meaning of course that we never acknowledge that we're having this issue. For the record I'm winning this particular round as she just left and I've, once again, returned all the mugs to their homes. Today was the first time she ever acknowledged our mug fiascoes.... it went like this:
Daria: Did you know that it is better to only have four mugs out at a time?
Me: I was not aware of that.
Daria: I keep moving the mugs and they seem to keep moving back.
Me: Uh huh.
Daria: Its classier to only have four mugs out.
Me: Uh huh.
Daria: It is.
Me: <blank silence>
Daria: I'm putting the mugs back under the counter now.
Me: Uh huh.
Daria: Its easier to keep the kitchen looking tidy if we only have two apiece, cause then you don't get a build up of mugs and dishes in the sink.
Me: Well then maybe you should wash your dishes, wipe the counters, sweep and mop the floors more often, and MAYBE, JUST MAYBE even consider taking off your shoes when you enter the house on occasion. Besides I really don't see the big issue, I NEED alot of mugs... they all mean something to me. I bought em, and I like to use em. Everything in this house is mine, you came with nothing... don't be handpicking what you think is good enough to have on display and what isn't. Show me the respect that you show all your other AMAZING friends in this life. I never hear you criticize anything that any of them do, own, or say... if they owned these mugs, these mugs would then be "kitsch and trendy", but cause I own em they must be controlled. Do you fear they will breed? Do you worry they will follow you to work and embarrass you? Or maybe, just maybe you fear that they will make you confront some aspect of your personality that you aren't yet ready to face. Is that it, HUH... IS THAT IT!!!!.
This was what I said to myself in the back of my passive aggressive brain. What I actually said to her in RL was more along the lines of...
Me: Uh huh.
But as soon as she left for work I quickly dashed out and rearranged all the mugs. I'm such a wiener.
I'm also a thief. Yesterday I was with a friend at the Doctor's office and while I was leaving my hands darted out and snagged a copy of the Vanity Fair with Nicholas Cage on the cover. Mr. Busy Pants shall forever be known as Mr. Sticky Fingers. Or in more modern English "Hey there, yeah you... return that magazine you fucking thief."
Shandra has had a small upset in her life... her b/f is moving back to the Vaterland. So I don't know what's gonna happen with that whole scenario. She's one of those women that is REALLY dependent on a man for validation. Now that she's dating I actually like her, as she no longer is A)home all the time. B)moping and dragging her sorry ass when she is home. C)finally seems to have a sense of humor and no longer spontaneously bursts into tears leaving Greg and I to whisper back and forth. "Go check and see what's wrong with her. NO damn you, I did it last time, its your turn. No way man, she's your whacko cousin not mine. Well honey, she's kinda like your cousin in law. Uh nuh, is not." You get the idea.
So we wonder if he wants her to come with him... did I mention they still haven't done the horizontal dance? Or if he'll leave her and she'll fly into a huge depression or not. Last but not least, whatever happens we KNOW that she'll stalk him regardless of the outcome. If she gets her heart broken then she'll def run home to mommy and daddy. Now I know it sounds callous, but that means Greg and I will be that much closer to eventually co-habitating. Don't look so shocked, I already said I was a wiener. She's nice enough but she's not really a part of my life in any huge fashion. She's just the creature that scurries around Greg's apartment leaving me to wonder outloud who ate the last piece of pizza when I had plans for it.
Last night we went out to rent a video and on our way there we ran into friends that were getting liquored up on a patio of one of the more obnoxiously trendy restaurants in the neighborhood. And basically got to sit and watch two friends just positively shred another friend that didn't speak the language. I found it really sad, in that the girl they were shredding is just such a loser, really she is. She would say inappropriate stuff, she would put her foot in her mouth, and was just begging to be slagged. I'm sure you know people like that. Its unfortunate but a fact of life.
We finally break free of this horrid encounter, rent vids, and then return home to grab some peace. Greg was of course more than willing to tell me all about how yet another guy asked him out at work tonight. It wouldn't be so bad, but this guy is gorgeous, sophisticated, and rich. He owns a gallery, drives a beemer, and is "too perfect" to use Greg's own words. He loves to make me jealous he does.
I sometimes do wonder just what it is that makes me the one he's chosen to be with. I'm not gorgeous, I'll never be rich, and I don't even own a car. Not that that matters but you know what I mean. Seems that everyone that asks Greg out starts by saying stuff like "never see you out in the clubs Greg" to which he responds "well I don't go out ever" and they in turn have to say "me either, I'm past all that, I want more out of life." So basically they ascertain to him that they want a long-term stable relationship and then proceed to ask him out. Drives me nuts it does. Its not just that he gets asked out, its the kind of men that ask him out. Definitely the more distinguished men that could in essence have their pick of anyone in the bar, or with a bar mentality. But yet he sticks with me, plods through our weekly pool nights and our sometimes non existent sex life (depending on how tired and busy we both are) and stays true to me. I love it. :)
Speaking of sex... I got some last night. Ok, so I got alot last night. But shhhhhhh, if I start chronicling my sex life then I'll just appear tawdry and nasty. But for the record... I told him I was getting myself a fist full of dollars tonight and would be tipping highly for a private dancer. He just rolled his eyes at me, but I'm gonna wear him down eventually I just know it. Pray for me and my hopes of a private dance.