MY JOURNAL ENTRIES

 

                            

Jan 5 11:01pm

**THE FOLLOWING JOURNAL ENTRY CONTAINS VIOLENCE, NUDITY, AND COARSE LANGUAGE. Viewer Discretion is Advised.**

Ok, so I exaggerate somewhat. Actually that's in reference to the movie that's coming on Superchannel right now. Diabolique. I've seen it before but I'm gonna keep it on while I update and wait to see if Jason shows himself on ICQ or not. There's one scene in the movie where they are trying to drown the main male character, its a shot of Isabelle Adjani and Sharon Stone's legs underwater, its my fav scene in the whole movie. Mostly because it just looks so campy. Two women in high heels and black skirts thrashing it out with some half dead guy in a swimming pool, HELLO... can we say director's fetish?

I have pneumonia, not officially, but I know the symptoms well enough. Coughing, fever, sore throat, lightheadedness, and very nasty temperament. I'm being a recluse and holing up in my apartment tonight. I phoned Greg and wasn't really curt with him, but I was kinda "off". Not really sure why though, its not his fault I feel miserable. Maybe I'm just getting increasingly tired of always having to wait till I can be alone with him. All weekend we had other people around us, the matinee buddy, Shandra, and a few other assorted "fans of Greg's". Yep, I swear to god the man has fans.

Matinee buddy went and saw the guy that knocked her up, and apparently he was "just wonderful" (can you hear the sarcasm?). He agreed to pay for her abortion and told her in no uncertain terms that if she decided to keep it, then he'd run for the hills and she'd never see him again. Hmmmmm, sounds like subtle manipulation to me, yet she says "I give him alot of credit for being upfront". Yeah, upfront that he's an asshole is about all that sums up to honey. But the worst part is that he spent the night trying to get her into bed, because "hey baby, at least we know you won't get pregnant now don't we?". I found her REALLY annoying all day yesterday, which is highly uncommon for me. Probably because she wanted to spend the whole day telling us what a great guy he is. Can you believe that he was a one night stand that wouldn't call her back, but everytime she ran into him she would have sex with him. She's really hung up on this guy, and now he's suggested to her that they remain "sex buddies" once she has it "taken care of". *GAG* She actually set up a night for him to have sex with her before she has the abortion. So she can avoid the pain etc of having sex after its "taken care of".

AHA... just figured out why I'm so annoyed with her. I always thought that she was a really strong girl capable of just doing her own thing. That was what I loved about her the most. Now to see her being such a fool over some guy that doesn't give a shit, drops her from my high regard. Which in turn makes me question my ability to judge others. See how that works? I've always believed that when anyone or any group annoys you, then the problem lies with you and not with them. Its just trying to find out what weakness or insecurities they are stimulating through their actions as to cause an emotional response from you. I'm almost feeling kinda deep right now, now terribly deep but you know, kind of a "mini" EUREKA moment.

Just noticed something really trivial, the woman who plays Sharon Stone's tenant in Diabolique, plays Helen Hunt's mother in As Good As It Gets. Which is the movie we saw yesterday actually. We had planned on seeing Titanic but of course we just assumed it was playing at the theater that was in the mall where we went to buy Greg's nephew his belated Xmas present. And I must say that As Good As It Gets was just a great movie. I'd actually see it again. Everyone else said that it was Ok, but too long as their asses hurt following. I was just enraptured through the whole thing. Greg seemed to like it, but I think we liked different things about it, so we weren't able to really discuss it following. As we were walking out of the theatre I was raving about how much I liked it, and I heard several people around me make comments like "that was the worst movie I've seen in 8 years" and "the most misspent two and a half hours of my life". I swear that I either have NO taste in movies or I'm just far too discerning that I can't relate to the average moviegoer.

One cool thing was that the other day when Greg and I were picking up movies, he saw Santa Sangre on the shelf and pointed at it while saying "you ever see that?" I had seen it, and thought it was one of the best movies I'd seen that year, but no one else had liked it, in fact all my friends had just hated it. Therefore I was almost not willing to say anything, but of course I did tell him what I thought. And he grinned and said "yeah, it was pretty amazing wasn't it". That made me grin to say the least. }:-) We definitely have our moments. My fav scene in that movie is when he's behind his mother combing her hair. If you watch the movie you'll recognize the scene right off, its VERY powerful and beautiful.

I caught up on all my journal readings tonight. Except that I only read three of em regularly. Miranda, Exodus, and James' journals. Exodus is experiencing some sort of suspended animation, James isn't writing his anymore, so it was only Miranda's that I had to read. Not that I mind, I really enjoy her writing, observations, and content. She definitely has one of the best looking journals I've seen. The artist really shows in this girl. Actually she totally reminds me of most the girls that I hung with in High School, and alot of myself at that age as well. But anyway if you've not ever read her journal do stop off and have a look, its definitely worth your time, or at least its worth my time. Exodus, Miranda, and James' journals are all on my links page FYI.

Jason and I met on NetMeeting today and we had a pretty good connection, finally we were able to actually talk, instead of just screaming "can you hear me?" Yet it was weird in that its not the most comfortable medium, and you still can't hear everything so the conversation doesn't flow. I always figured its more for perverts, children, and people learning English. You can't have an actual talk over it, so I have some trouble seeing the point. I wish he'd just phone me someday so that we can just talk for real. Ummm, change that... I have a boyfriend so I shouldn't be talking to him. I know that whenever I do I have the urge to flirt etc. Maybe its that I want him to show interest so that I don't feel stupid for being so hung up on him for so long. Stupid isn't it? I gotta start watching myself, I don't want to do anything to jeopardize my relationship with Greg and I seem to be slowly heading that way. I can be such an ass at times.

Greg and I have our plans for the next ten days cemented in stone already, how's that for typical couple behavior? A couple of what you might ask? Yeah I know, puns are the lowest form of humor... I'm losing it, time to hang up and grab a big bottle of Dimetapp and crawl into a hot tub and soak my complaints away.

Slowly walking towards tub...

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