My Journal Entries...



April 4th 1:30am

Soooo, I decided to finally leave my house today. Yep, I conformed to the life of the non-hermit. I went over to make Greg dinner and it was pretty lame. Kinda like one of those "things" your mom makes when you're a kid, and even though you know she's just using up all the ripened leftovers and bits of food that have lingered on in the cupboards and fridge for WAY too long. But he still ate it, and he still thanked me. He knows who's buttering his bread he does...

We were supposed to stretch a painting that he'd received today, it had been sent up by his parents as he wanted to wait till he was totally settled before he got it back. But then we realized that it was missing parts of the frame, and his parents confessed to not sending the whole thing once he phoned them. Soooooo, instead we rented vids, ate ice cream and lolly-gagged about the house all night. I was teasing him about being his sugar daddy, as when we were heading out we realized his wallet was in the bathroom and that Shandra was holed up in there scrubbing her pits for her big date tonight. It was cute in that when I was leaving for the night he asked to borrow cigarettes and we summed it up as a "you've had your fun now leave your money (read cigarettes) on the dresser and get the hell out". Guess you had to be there, but it was funny, I swear. I left him six cigs, he proclaimed that was too many... I winked and said "you earned em baby"... he then tried to punch me in the arm. :)

Prior to all this he was telling me why he wasn't home last night when I phoned... he had a "date". A guy that Greg sends alot of business to asked him out to supper. And YES he went, the rat bastard. Kidding. He loves holding over me how often business associates ask him out, and its alot. He gets all happy when he knows that its driving me nuts when he doesn't give ALL the details, instead I have to fish for them. Anyway, the guy was "not his type", and yes Greg took the first opportunity of the evening to mention that he was in a long-term relationship. He loves making me jealous, he gets this really mischievous grin and will start snickering. Don't get me wrong though, its not a bleached blonde, over-permed, blue eyeshadowed, trailerpark accent, accentuated by pineapple earrings and butterfly'd fingernails "gonna make you so angry you're gonna bust your pool cue over this guy's head because I'm leaning over in my tightest top with my tits hanging out" sorta thing... but rather a "you know I love you, but I love teasing ya" sorta deal. So of course, when I was a little late I had to lament about how pleased I was that he hadn't made other dinner plans when I wasn't right on time. Overall it was a really light night. Definitely one of those nights when I don't question "us", and just enjoy him and how he makes me feel. And hopefully how I make him feel. At one point I looked over and he had stuck five dollars in loose change to his forehead and said "tell me I'm cute". Not relevant really, but I think it sums up the night quite nicely to say the least. Did  I mention I'm dating a Super-Goof?

We watched Mr. Bean, as Greg hadn't seen it yet. I'd seen it in the theatre but no problem I can watch it twice. It wasn't super painful or anything that bad. Not great mind you, and I'm definitely not endorsing it. Then we watched Chasing Amy, now that I AM endorsing. I totally loved it, but not in a "OHMIGOD" sort of way, but rather a "damn now that was a good flick, I'll have to buy it someday" sort of way. If you haven't seen it, then I'd say you really should. Maybe it was because I could relate to the characters more due to things in my past and where I've been, plus things I've come to grips with myself from my past, yet had them held over me by my ex's.

It also made an "in" for me. This "in" consisted of me casually asking Greg how he would feel if someone he was intimate with chronicled their intimate relationship, pitfalls, and growths. If you've seen it then you understand how I could casually mention this without him becoming suspicious. He said he'd be flattered that someone could find inspiration in his intimacies, but would hate if they used his name. So I responded "if someone for example... wrote about your relationship, but say called you "Greg" or something then you'd be OK?" He said "yep, as long as it didn't interfere in my life and cause me to be recognizable then yeah." Stated he was a private person and that he doesn't divulge intimacies, but doesn't care if others do. So I'm trying to rationalize whether or not he indirectly gave me permission, and trying to theorize what I would have done had he stated that he would never tolerate such an action or invasion of privacy. Had he stated it as a betrayal then I would probably be writing my last entry today. But he didn't..... ummm, so I'm not.

Nother odd note. He was asking one friend for another friend's Email addy tonight since he no longer has her new phone number. Stated that I could E her and ask for the number then. He then out of the blue said... "I want to see your WebPages." I just sorta stammered and said "which ones", he responded "all of them." I laughed and changed the subject, but he came back to it and stated that he was serious. He THEN started asking about how hard it was to make one and talking himself through the process of whether or not he wants one himself and what would be the point. I think he will eventually decide to make one to promote himself as an artist more than anything else, rather than just having the generic static bio page. Or should I say he'll eventually decide to make me make him one. It felt REALLY bizarre to have him suddenly show an interest in the net as a medium, as he's NEVER shown even one lick of interest before. Not counting the one time he asked me to look up KMFDM tour dates.


OK.... now who did this? Huh, huh, huh? You can't be sending out pictures of beautiful men and not giving your Email addy so that people can send you a thank you. I'm the only one allowed to be cryptic in this relationship... its been awhile since I was seriously piqued but this is one of those times. Got a question for you then... if you think I live in *******, where do you reside? I assume in the above encrypted city as well? Now you gotta respond, feedback.... I crave feedback. Thanks for the pic though, as you obviously have good taste. :)


Aaaaah, I see Jason popping on and off of ICQ so I'm gonna try and grab him before he's gone again. Later...

PS: My friend that was supposed to take me skiing on Tuesday, FINALLY called today. But cause I'm annoyed at him I may not call back. He leaves tomorrow and I'm choked that I waited around all week wanting to get to the mountains, as I'd considered it a date. He'll give me some story about how him and his boyfriend had problems and he couldn't get away. Grrrrrrrrrr...

PPS: I still have several hours of paperwork, sympathy anyone?

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