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June 14th (transcribed)

***your life's not a joke, but it's painfully funny***

Artificial Joy Club

So Shandra has stopped the waterworks over her lost love finally. Phew... FINALLY!!! But I swear there is something with this girl that is not right. She pines <sp?> away for a man that doesn't want her and is ready to move away the next day because she's a walking disaster area. She laments and laments and drives EVERYONE nuts in the process, but suddenly the tears stop. No warning... just no more tears suddenly.

Yep, you guessed it, someone asked her on a date. And wow... what a man it is at that. This guy is nice looking, super pleasant and bearable in the personality department. I wouldn't date him... well ok maybe I would, but you'll find out why soon enough. He's met her once before asking her out. On the first date he tells her that he's heard she's going back home and he tells her how much he wants to get to know her and how instant his attraction was to her. He begs her to buy a ticket return and  to promise him she'll come back so that they can at least have a chance to find out if they are compatible... actually he claims that he KNOWS they are but he wants her to find out for herself. He tells her he'll buy her a ticket and even go with her if she wants. He tells her she should get her own place... she says "I can't afford it"... he says "I'll help you with that". He asks to spend more time alone in her room watching TV... she says "I don't have a TV in my room"... he says "I'll buy you one"... she says "I don't have cable so what's the point?"... he offers to buy her cable and a VCR. She tells us she's uncertain about him. I tell her he's fucking nuts. I meet him... he's adorable and definitely not crazy just incredibly upfront and genuine. She keeps waffling. I tell her to grab him now or I'm gonna date him. Greg says "what?"... I say "honey we could use another TV."

I tried to explain to her that a man like this comes along ONCE in a lifetime and you have to exploit it while you can. I mean we've all had at least one, and as sexual and abusive beings its our right... no our obligation to take advantage of it while we can. She claims to be all hung up on you-know-who, yet she doesn't lament for him and she's talked to this new guy on the phone six times a day or more since the first date, and they've seen each other every single night since. He used to own a computer consulting company and has sold it and apparently is somewhat retired now... he's my age. He's definitely her ideal man, he's a husband and she's a wife. They're perfect for each other in so many ways. Greg and I are so certain that we're gonna MAKE her date him if it kills us.

Its weird though, I don't even know if I like Shandra or not, but she's like the sixteen year old niece of the brother you hate... but yet you feel "something" for the kid and want to see her succeed. And yes, it could be because she is in so many ways a pathetic-ish example of what every woman does NOT want to strive for. I feel nothing when she's being hysterical and sobbing like a madwoman, yet I can look at her objectively and think about what I would like to see for her. Its like the kid you bugged all through high school and years later you see them and they can't keep off of you. You then realize that all that time they thought the repoire was some twisted concept of friendship... and now you not only are crippled with guilt over being so nasty to them, but are confronted with the fact that all the nasty things you said to them are true. YET... it somehow makes them attractive in an "I'm so happy, cause I'm so stupid" sort of way.

And what her highness needs is a man that will love her unconditionally and fully commit himself to her with no expectations. Someone who is so infatuated that he'll let her be the subservient passive one, as that is what she is... a very traditional dated concept of what a wife once was. I've never had a problem with defined gender roles within relationships, despite what all my PC Gloria Steinem-loving bull dyke friends may say. If you want to stay home and be a baby farm then I say more power to you. As long as that is a role that you've chosen for yourself and not a role someone else has chosen for you.

***nuff bout her***

So I never mentioned that I'd given the lamp that I bought my mom to Elizabeth to give to my mom when she continued on her journey, but I had. I gave Elizabeth a lamp to give to my mom in case that first sentence made no sense, and I have my suspicions it was all greek to you. Just clarifying it and now I'm moving on.

So I phone above said mom to tell her "hey slag, yer lamp's coming". And lo and behold above said mom is out of town till the end of the week and I feel really shitty as mom was supposed to be helping her with her survey thingie. I make her secretary promise on her dear mother's grave (may she rest in peace) that she (the secretary) will indeed meet with Liz and help her out. I phone the mom back today... cause I love the mom alot and just wanted to chat and see if she liked her lamp or not. Mom tells me that Liz and her have  played telephone tag all day Saturday but did meet up later in the evening and mom got her lamp finally. Mom loooooooooves the lamp. I knew she would, so I'm not surprised in the least. And the mom loved the little Harvard student as well... I knew she would.

I start to inquire as to what time they were visiting at, and mom explains between around 9 and 1130 PM. I start to worry that my mom may have been a bit liquored up by this time and I get kinda self conscious as to whether or not mom was behaving herself. Any of you with parents that are alcoholic can relate to this one. Then I had to give my head a shake and tell myself that regardless I would not make excuses or be embarrassed even if she had been misbehaving. I know my mom and she's the most decent person I know. Despite her few personal shortcomings and weaknesses she will always get by on the size of her heart and her genuine love of others. So I tell myself that I hope she was just being a friendly and congenial host... I tell myself again that it doesn't matter. I fight the urge to ask her directly.


Greg is pretty pleased as a visitor to his apartment has made a serious inquiry about buying two of his pieces. He's set the price at 800dollars each, the guy wants one but is inquiring about two separate pieces. He knows he doesn't have a name yet as an artist so 800 is the highest he would charge, I think the guy will go for it   as he seemed very serious. We'd been discussing a piece that we'd seen earlier in the day at a gallery that was 12inches by 15inches and worth almost three thousand and he didn't blink, so therefore he is aware of the price of art thankfully. Nothing worse than having to explain to someone, and attempt to justify to them, the cost of fine art.


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